I’ve given in …

January 25, 2011 at 2:41 pm | Posted in rheumatoid arthritis (RA) | 2 Comments

So … I admit it … this shoulder is really starting to get me down, p me off, put my beak out of joint etc. I’ve finally stopped saying, ‘This too will pass,’ or ‘it’ll go away if I do my exercises’ or ‘I just need to adjust my neck pillow’ or whatever, and made an appointment with the doctor to see if she’ll refer me to physio.

My previous on-going physio sessions haven’t been going on since the summer, because they had a bit of an NHS shake-up at the hospital and decided that no one was allowed more than five appointments – everything can, apparently, be sorted out in five appointments, or so the top dogs say. So, given that I’d already had about fifty-five appointments, I turned up one day and was told, ‘Sorry, but this is your last one. Don’t worry though, you can have more if you get referred by your doctor.’ Fortunately it coincided with a pretty good patch and I haven’t needed to go back.

So … I’ve made an appointment with the doctor but I can’t see her until Feb 8th. Then there’s a five-week waiting list to see the physio (or at least that’s what they were planning when they told me I couldn’t have any more. It might be more than five weeks now. The point of  the five appointments only thing was to get the waiting list down to manageable proportions and make it a five-week waiting list. We shall see …

So …. by the time I DO see a physio (assuming the doc is willing to refer me, gets the letter dictated, gets the secretary to type it up, gets it posted), we’re looking at end of March. And that’s why I’ve been putting off going to see the doc in the first place, because I kept thinking it’s not that bad, and it’s bound to clear up soon etc. The silly thing is it’s not that bad … but it’s just niggling away all the time as these things do, and quietly affecting everything else in my life including what’s left of my sanity!

Still … thinking positively … if it has gone away by then, great – someone else will be in luck when they get a call saying there’s been a cancellation … and if it hasn’t then at least I’ll be seeing someone, and not deciding then to see the doc and having to wait until the end of May for an appointment!

Woohoo – the rain’s stopped and the sun’s coming out – and I feel magically cheered up all of a sudden!

Not a very positive Polly Penguin today!

January 25, 2011 at 2:27 pm | Posted in rheumatoid arthritis (RA) | Leave a comment

I don’t know why I’m so on edge today!

Part of the problem is that I’m not 100% health-wise … when am I ever, grumble, grumble, but the good ol’ RA is playing up slightly again – the migraine has gone away for the moment (thanks again to all for the comments and thoughts on that!) but the neck and shoulders are still giving me hassle, so that’s probably putting me on edge to start with.

On top of that, yesterday was another ‘one of those days’ and then I didn’t sleep well last night … partly because of the shoulder and partly probably my subconscious playing through yesterday’s happenings, trying to make sense of them … and failing! The morning yesterday was full of really rush jobs – i.e. the client sends them and wants the transcribed file back an hour later. That’s fine, if it’s been agreed in advance, which it had. Once I’d done the two files we’d agreed on I asked him if he would have any more as I needed to pop out for half an hour or so, but could do it any time. This was about 11 am and he said, ‘Go now – we won’t have any more until 12′. So I went to take Genevieve up to the garage to do a ‘five minute job’ of replacing her fuse-box cover. I should know better than to believe a garage man when he says, ‘Five minute job,’ shouldn’t I?

So there I was, getting into the car at just gone eleven when I happened to glance up at the road in front of the car park and saw a very elderly man crossing the road. ‘Gosh,’ I thought, ‘he bears an amazing resemblance to Bart’s Grandpa in the Simpsons!’ at which point he vanished! After a second I realised that he hadn’t been a Simpsons-induced figment of my imagination, but rather he had fallen over and was now hidden behind the car park wall, so I rushed over to see what I could do. Poor chap only had to go about 200 yards from one building to another but it had proved a bit too much. A couple of other people rushed over and we managed to get him sitting up (having assessed that that seemed an OK thing to do!) and then someone fetched his daughter while I found him a tissue to mop the scalp wound which was bleeding profusely, as they do! His daughter was in the building he’d been heading for, and she and a friend got him back to the health centre he’d just come from and then off to hospital, so I was surplus to requirements and headed off, feeling slightly shaken.

Given that I was feeling slightly shaken and have no sense of direction, it’s a shame I didn’t decide to give up and go to the garage later, but there we go, I didn’t. So I was driving along, busy thinking about this poor old chap and hoping he was alright, and hoping I’d remember which road I needed to turn down, and thinking about the job I might or might not have at 12 … and I eventually realised that I’d gone sailing past my turning and was now about two miles down the wrong road!

So …. things are now starting to run seriously late … but I thought, ‘I’ve got this far now, so I might as well carry on …’ Got to the garage, pulled into the wrong unit (which I always do!), grinned sheepishly at the man in the unit I’d just pulled into (as I always do!), pulled out, got into the garage … ‘Take a seat and we’ll sort that out for you …’

So, after about twenty minutes of playing ball with the garage’s resident dogs (not that good for the shoulder, it transpired!) I was starting to get a big concerned about the time and went to chase up the car. They were working on it, which was better than I expected, but I think the ‘temporary fix’ they’d done to get me through the weekend was proving a bit less temporary than first thought! Anyway, eventually got away … dashed back to work thinking about this job that might be coming in at 12:00, into the office at 12:01 … wrote to the client and said, ‘I’m back …’ and haven’t heard anything from him since!

Then today, perhaps partly because I’m on my own in the office today and so I have no one to vent to, I’ve been getting really, really frustrated … climbing up the wall frustrated, with the fact that there are people in the room opposite my office nattering away at the tops of their voices about stuff that’s obviously of vital import to their business … like bee keeping, holidays in the Algarve, etc. I suppose actually it would be worse if they really were talking about stuff of vital import to their business, but it’s just as irritating to me either way. The problem is that it’s a tiny, windowless room and so people will go in there and decide to leave the door open so it doesn’t feel too claustrophobic.  Fine – but if you do that then have a thought for the other people in the building. Grrr … I shouldn’t be SO irritated because I know the people who were in there this morning were only using it as a temporary measure (thank gawd!) while another room is being decorated and it probably won’t happen again, at least with them.

I got so irritable earlier that I’m amazed they didn’t hear me going, ‘Shut up! SHut up! Shut the f***** up, I don’t want to know about your f****ing bees’ etc.!

I can’t escape for a walk either because it’ s pouring!!!

Waaaaaaaaah!

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