Weddings and wearables

April 15, 2010 at 12:57 pm | Posted in rheumatoid arthritis (RA) | 15 Comments
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I have a wedding to go to in August – I’ve mentioned this once or twice before! – but what am I going to wear when I can’t wear ‘nice’ shoes?

I get the feeling (probably erroneous) from my mum that she and other family members  have been discussing how to make sure Polly doesn’t look too awful for the wedding. <Sigh> Shoe-wise I really can’t wear the ugly contraptions that are my everyday-wear, but I want something deep and wide enough to fit my orthotics, closed-toed so I don’t feel self-concious about the RA side of things and that doesn’t look like this:

Dr. Scholl's - Men's Michael Air-Pillo Gel Velcro Shoes, Wide WidthI’m sure you can see why!

Thanks to my ‘interesting’ body shape it’s a sod to find trousers that fit properly so the obvious trouser-suit option probably isn’t a serious option … although I suppose I could alter it … and anyway, it’s going to be summer, so those kind of shoes are going to look wrong with ANYTHING! And I don’t want to look like this:

(With apologies to LimeGreenSquid for nicking his picture. If you object, let me know and I’ll take it down but it’s just soooo perfect!)

Since methotrexate’s magic weight-loss effect seems to have lasted a mere two weeks, I suspect I won’t be losing a few stone before then and presenting a sylph-like figure either, so all in all I’m a bit fed-up. There’s no pleasure in clothes shopping when you look and feel like this and I’ve never in my life had pleasure from shoe shopping – so while I’m really looking forward to the wedding, the preamble is worrying me slightly.

Pumps or flat Mary-Janes won’t fit the orthotics, but at least they’d be flat. Maybe that’s the way to go and a day without orthotics might not hurt toooo much. (I can see the steam coming out of hubby’s ears when he reads this, but sometimes a gal’s gotta do what a gal’s gotta do!)

Whatever I end up with it has to be flat. I don’t fancy spending the week after the wedding in self-induced vanity-related agony!

Bright ideas anyone?



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  1. In a fit of rebellion I went barefoot a couple weeks ago. That isn’t something I’d particularly recommend. And I should’ve known better since even an hour without my orthotics makes my feet and ankles hurt. Stick with the orthotics!

    As for the shoes, mine aren’t exactly what I would’ve selected before RA, but I don’t think they’re too terribly ugly. I have a post titled “comfortable shoes” that includes a couple pix and a bunch of links to online sources. Shoes made by Naot are extremely comfortable, and are made so that orthotics can easily replace the footbed. I own their primrose and surf styles; there are a couple other styles that aren’t horribly unattractive, and they even make a few pumps (but I haven’t tried them).

  2. September?! ;o) I don’t know if it would help, but have a look at the photos from the ceilidh and see the shoes I’m wearing there, I thoroughly recommend them and I have big wide feet!

    How about meeting up with the bride to be for a shopping trip nearer the time? She always looks fantastic and might be able to help find something to make you feel really good about yourself. As for me, I think I’m just not going to eat for the next 4 months…

  3. DOH! Why do I have this obsession with September?! (Actually I think I know – you might too if you cast your mind back far enough!) I think those are ‘Mary-Janes’ you’re wearing if I remember rightly, so I’m considering them but think the orthotics probably won’t fit. WarmSocks reckons lack of orthotics is a really bad plan and Hubby will too! Nice idea about meeting up with Mrs Mooo but she has the slight advantage of being a size 10 and the slight disadvantage of barely being in England between now and the wedding, so I don’t think that’s going to happen, nice though it would be. If I had the willpower I’d go with your not eating plan … ;o)

  4. Thanks – I’ll check out your post and the links – although we’ll have to see what’s available over her in Blighty – not a lot I suspect. ;o)


  6. Ooh, ta!


    Please post pictures once you find your shoes. 😀

  8. No steam coming out of my ears…one day without corrective orthotics probably won’t hurt.

  9. Will post pictures. ;o) Thanks for all these – LOVE the name ‘cheerful soles’ and what a great website … but not so sure i like their shoes! Did like some on Naot and will look at the others tomorrow. Thanks again! P

  10. Hmm … glad about the lack of steam, but I’m not convinced about the lack of orthotics! 🙂

  11. Ooh dear, sorry to be causing stress and despondency! But on the other hand, am very grateful for this post as it has stimulated so many useful shoe recommendations – am itching to try out Concept Shoes.
    Just how big are them there orthotics then? Is there any chance you could get some ’slightly less effective but fit in a pair of Mary Janes’ orthotics made for special occasions? Personally I think shoes shouldn’t dictate your whole outfit, even if they don’t ‘go’ – better to be wearing a fabulous dress or something with big shoes, than big shoes and heavy trousers that ‘go’ but make you feel decidedly non-party esque… or of course there is the ’small flat shoes which go with fab outfit for photos and initial stages’ approach, followed by big shoes with full orthoticness to change into later when the lights are low and shoes will be the last thing on anyone’s mind…hmm, maybe I’ll do that too!
    Beware of Hotter flat Mary Janes though – I bought some and they were hideously uncomfortable with a really weak sole and no heel support, that meant I could feel every pebble.
    There will be PLENTY of seats available at all times by the way, made very sure of that after hideous experiences standing chatting with drinks for hours feeling like knives are slicing one to bits…
    oh and I’d just like to point out for the record that I’m nowhere near a size 10, I wish!!

  12. I had a similar problem – finally found some decent sandals from Aravon, part of New Balance. They come in different widths and have insoles that can be removed and replaced with orthotics. It looks like they have UK outlets.

  13. In case it’s useful – just found Profoot Triads in local chemist: and they are truly ace. They fit in teeny tiny shoes and do a fantastic job of keeping everything in the right place and cushioning impact, or at least that’s been the case for me. I’m hoping they’ll even fit in wedding shoes!

  14. Thanks Kim – not keen on sandels but definitely like the idea of removable insoles! Will have to look into this. ;o)

  15. OOH, interesting! Are they really slim then? You can’t tell from the pictures. I will have to see if our local chemist stocks them. They’d be ideal for occasional use …such as certain upcoming weddings … ;o)

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